The 25 Worst Possible Names for DJ Systemism (And Why I Saved the Culture From Them) - by DJ Buddy Holly

 

The 25 Worst Possible Names for DJ Systemism (And Why I Saved the Culture From Them)

By DJ Buddy Holly (David Charles Kramer)

Every great movement in DJ history has its defining moment.

For turntablism, it was the first scratch. For controllerism, it was the first MIDI mapping that didn’t crash. For DJ Systemism, it was me — sitting at my desk, staring into the void, realizing that if I didn’t name this lane properly, the internet absolutely would.

And trust me… the names they would’ve come up with? Pure chaos. Linguistic war crimes. The kind of terminology that makes a CDJ‑3000 close its disc tray in disgust.

So today, as a public service, I present:

🎚️ The 25 Worst Names We Avoided When Coining DJ Systemism

Because someone had to protect the culture.

1. Standaloneism

Sounds like a printer mode. Also describes DJs who literally stand alone because I got the gig.

2. Standalonery

For DJs who want to sound medieval while updating firmware.

3. Standaloniacs

The DJs who swear their Mixstream Pro+ is “just as good as a CDJ‑3000.”

4. Unitism

A cult that worships a toaster.

5. Unitarian DJing

One God. One jog wheel. One USB port.

6. AIO‑ism

Tech‑bro energy. Guaranteed to die in a Discord server.

7. AIOlogy

The study of why your all‑in‑one froze during the first dance.

8. Deckism

Everything has decks. Even cruise ships.

9. Consolism

Sounds like a religion for people who pray to their Xbox.

10. Console DJing

DJ Hero flashbacks. No thank you.

11. Integrated DJing

Reads like a dishwasher brochure.

12. Boxism

For DJs who perform on “the box.” Which could also be a microwave.

13. One‑Box DJing

Sounds like a shipping method.

14. All‑In‑One‑ology

A field of study that will never get tenure.

15. System DJing

Actually decent. But not iconic enough to be a movement.

16. Systematic DJing

For DJs who alphabetize their crates and label their cables.

17. Platformism

Ambiguous enough to be a political party.

18. Rigism

Sounds like a CrossFit routine.

19. Stationism

For DJs who perform from a train station, I guess.

20. Hub DJing

No one wants to be associated with “the hub.”

21. Centralism

Sounds like a government ideology.

22. Mixerism

Already taken by bartenders.

23. Tabletopism

For DJs who perform on IKEA furniture.

24. Fusion DJing

Too vague. Could be sushi.

25. Monolith DJing

Cool name, but implies your gear weighs 800 pounds.

⭐ And Then There Was DJ Systemism

After surveying the entire wasteland of possible names, one stood out as:

• clean

• elegant

• intuitive

• culturally aligned

• future‑proof

• brand‑neutral

• actually sounds like an artform

DJ Systemism is the only term that names the instrument (the DJ system), fits the lineage (turntablism, controllerism), and doesn’t sound like a rejected setting on a washing machine.

It’s the name that sticks. The name that works. The name that won’t embarrass you in front of a CDJ‑3000.

And yes — I coined it. Because someone had to save the culture from “Boxism.”